Hearing about the good times anyone is having if you consider those people your equals or inferiors in general
Things hated and loved by Marion Milner
Welcome to the twenty-first issue of the Lists of Note newsletter. Each Sunday, a new (old) list.
Born in London in 1900, Marion Milner was a renowned psychoanalyst, educationalist and artist known to many as Joanna Field, the pseudonym she used as an author. In 1934, A Life of One’s Own was published—the culmination of a years-long journey during which she had attempted to discover what made her happy. In that book, amongst the many diary entries and philosophical ruminations, can be found a list she had discovered in her papers, written some time before this journey began, of things she had at one point hated and loved.
Things I hate
Things that are meaningless and full of detail.
Suburban roads and houses.
Making a fool of myself.
Being laughed at.
Being in disagreement with people.
Being disapproved of.
Glaring lights, unshaded.
Being copied in my attempts to be original.
Being made to feel conspicuous.
Old society ladies.
Frittering time on household necessities especially when it’s fine.
Spending a lot of money on something I don’t like.
Being cold, having wet feet.
Being conspicuous, having arguments in public places or being unsuitably dressed.
Having my taste or actions criticized.
Quarrels between my friends.
People taking it for granted that they can share my things.
Being made use of.
Earnest, dowdy, or arty women.
Velvet and plush chairs.
The suggestion or feeling that you are dominated by anyone.
Hearing about the good times anyone is having if you consider those people your equals or inferiors in general.
Things I love
Flowers, light and colors.
The patience of cart-horses.
The abandon and moods of dogs.
Sharing an idea in conversation when minds move together.
Bodily sensations, hot sun, wind, rhythm, relaxation after exercise, water, and fire.
The sense of strangers’ moods arising from a glimpse of their faces and attitudes.
Confidences from people-strangers or friends.
Companionably sharing things, forestalling someone’s need.
Getting at what someone is driving at in a play or picture.
Fairs, loitering in a crowd.
Beginning nice things.
Traditional knowledge for tilling the soil, seamanship, and crafts: as opposed to efficiency methods.
Intricate mechanisms that are not manmade.
Freedom from possessions.
Hands and human skin.
Attraction towards a person.
A new idea when first it is grasped.
People singing out of doors.